Saturday, January 19, 2013

Neuro and Changes

J's Christmas shoes above

So much has been going on that it's hard to catch up in one blog post.

We were all down with the flu at Christmas, including my parents, so it was a very quiet holiday this year.  Slowly but surely we are all getting better except for the ever present lingering cough.

After Christmas it became very clear that some things needed to change.  I seemed to be angry and depressed all the time.  A lot of it came from some serious things happening in my family.  Some of it was leftover from years of forgetting myself.  Something had to give. Soon.

Changes are being put in place to get us out of our rut and to help get a little more healthy.  A vegetarian menu has replaced our regular dining fare.  A feat that is nothing short of miraculous since I love my meat with a side of meat.  So far I haven't missed it but the recipes I've been using I have been really satisfying.  More activity is being included in our daily routine.  Zumb* has been added and it's kicking my tail.  Not to mention I look flat out ridiculous since I don't have a coordinated bone in my body and absolutely no rhythm.  I could care less and just keep moving.  Eventually I will get it or not.  Either way is fine.

I have spent less time on the computer and more time engaged.  I am limiting the amount of negativity that I "hear" and "see." I am happier when I am more focused on the positive.  J and I have started a new thing that we do together.  At the end of every day we each list at least 5 kind and loving things we have done for each other.  I'll make a list of what I've done for her that was kind and loving, at the same time she's making a list of what she's done for me.  This has been interesting.  #1 It helps me make sure that I have not gotten busy with daily business and forgotten to be engaged with loving acts.  #2 J's list helps me see what she perceives as kind and loving so that I'm fully attuned to her needs.  Sometimes we have the same things on our list.  That's good too.  It lets me know I'm connecting with her where she needs me to.  #3 It's cementing the fact that she is indeed a kind and loving person AND helping her be attuned to my perception of loving kindness.  A reciprocal relationship.  It's always a good thing.

With all the changes I have come to realize that we had also gotten in a rut with our tapping routine.  Ummmm....note to HAVE to change up the tapping routine for it to work effectively.  Duh, Lisa.  I'm trying to make an effort to change it up at least every two or three weeks.  Maybe I should add a phone alarm to remind me or I'll get in a rut again.

J has started doing a tapping script (on her own) to help her to go to sleep and she has learned that if she wakes up in the middle of the night she can tap it and she'll fall right back to sleep, usually in the middle of her script. :)

We are still doing TRE with great results.  For both of us.  Such a simple, easy way to let your body release trauma.  I'm still astounded at the changes we have seen.  The book was helpful but honestly I've gotten more out of the DVD.  Kristy and I both think they should be doing these exercises in school.  Lindsay, Wendy and I are going to be doing a class on them in Orlando at ETAAM for those that are interested.  Speaking of ETAAM, there are just a few spots left if you're interested in going.  Email me if you're interested.

Next week we are starting neuro-reorganization.  We've done something a little similar in the past with The Learning Breakthrough Program and so much was gained through that program that I'm really excited to start with neuro-reorg.  Kara started it just last week and her family is already seeing some interesting (in a good way) results.

J's Newest Script (mine is below):

Even tho I want my life to be easy, I'm willing to work hard on my life.

Even tho I have challenges, my mom totally loves me.

Even tho I hate making mistakes, I'm human so I should make mistakes.

Even tho I want to be a perfectionist, if I were perfect that would make me boring.

Even tho I am still scared a lot of the time, I'm a totally great kid.

Just for today I will work hard on my life.

Just for today I will be able to show love and receive love.

Today I will do things that will make me proud of myself.

I can laugh at my mistakes today because I'm not supposed to be perfect.

I can be kind to myself.

I will let go of some fear today.

I will feel close to my mom today.

I will love myself and others.

I will let others help me when I need it and it's ok to ask for help.

When I start feeling wonky I will choose to tap to make myself feel better.

Today is a new day and I can choose to have a good day.

It's totally my choice to have a good day.

My new script:

Even tho I'm not perfect, I'm not supposed to be.

Even tho I hate making mistakes, that makes me human.

Even tho I screw up all the time, I accept myself.

Even tho I wish I had all the answers, I can just do the next right thing.

Even tho I've had a lot of losses, this is part of life.

Even tho I have so much anger, I totally love and accept myself.

Today I will be a kind and loving parent.

Just for today I will allow myself to make mistakes.

I will laugh at myself and my screw ups and repair them when I'm able.

Today I will be kind and loving to myself.

Today I will let go of the serious and embrace some fun.

I'm letting go of the anger.

I'm letting all the anger go and replacing it with happiness.

I will love myself and others.

I will let go of some of the fear.

I will ask for help when I need it and let others help me.

I do not have to have all the answers.

Today is a new day and I can choose to make it a good day.

When I start feeling wonky I will choose to tap to change things up.

Today I choose to have a good day.

Amazing how similar our scripts are, huh?


Diana said...

I'm SOOO coming to your class! The learning will be lovely, but FINALLY being able to hug you in person will be even better!

GB's Mom said...

Yay for the next right thing!

Annie said...

I think the thing I most envy about you is that you really seem to have the time to focus on your daughter (and even some time left over for yourself). Like many adoptive parents I have a LOT of kids, all needing help of some kind (regular kids can be pretty needy, too - in terms of wanting to EAT and needing to be driven all over the place). I feel as though my little girl could be doing so much better if her mama had more than a couple of minutes here and there to focus, really focus on her. (I mean - I do not even have time to do the READING on any of the strategies you mention....just glance at the first page of the site.) Frustrating.

Lisa said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
The Accidental Mommy said...

Well check me out, the comments are working for me now!
Anyway, I love those yellow shoes so much I want to marry them. I know that's not the purpose of your post but I had to say it. I don't think I would even wear them, I'd frame them in a memory box maybe.

Megan said...

I love those love lists! What a great idea!