Friday, February 4, 2011

From J

Dear RAD moms and RAD kids,

Thank you very much for the comments and noticing how hard I've worked on my RAD stuff.  It makes me very happy to help other RAD kids and RAD moms.  RAD moms have a really, really hard job helping their kids.  RAD kids have a really, really hard job trying to get better because they're really, really terrified even if they won't admit it.  That makes it harder for RAD moms.  Someday if they work really hard they'll be able to tell you thank you for helping them.  Maybe if they can't tell you now I'll tell you for them, "thank you for working so hard to help your kids get over RAD. Keep telling your kids that love is stronger than fear.  Love is stronger than anything in whole wide world.

I'm sorry that we make life hard on RAD moms.  We don't really mean to it's because we were hurt so much. 

I'm thinking about going to work on my blog. My mom and I'll talk about it and we'll see.  I don't like typing so my Mom typed this for me.  If I write on my blog I have to do all the typing.  I'm not crazy about that.

Ms. Corey, my mom read your blog to me.  You were so smart not to make a big production over V's "you".  She would have exploded.  You're a smart mom!  It makes me very happy that V was able to tell you she cares about you.  I know that was hard for her.  Tell V don't ever quit, it' s worth the hard work to feel love.  Love is really beautiful and you have a lot more fun when you figure out it's not so scary.

Keep hope.  We're worth it.

Sincerely,
J
♥♥♥♥♥♥

20 comments:

Kelly said...

Oh J, you are such a sweet, smart and amazing girl. You ARE worth it and my Jackson is worth it too. With your mom's help and the hope I see from you I am given the tools, courage and strength to keep working. Thank you so much for writing and opening up about your feelings. You are such a brave and beautiful girl, inside and out. Kelly

Deborah said...

J, you are a wonderful little girl. I know your mom said that it took awhile for you to be able to accept compliments, so I hope we don't freak you out with all the compliments you're going to get here. You have worked really hard and seen rewards. And I would love it if you started blogging again!

Diana said...

Both of you are beautiful and amazing! Thank you for sharing your hearts and HOPE with us!

Ruth Chowdhury said...

J, thank you so much for sharing with us! You are an inspiration to many moms and kids. Thank you, Lisa, for typing for J. I hope J blogs again, even if it is a lot of work to type. ;)

Essie the Accidental Mommy said...

Ah, J, I missed your perspective. I am happy that you are sharing what you have learned.

:)De said...

J, I can't wait to let my Jordan read this. She is 12 and has some fears too. Thnak you both for sharing with us.

Anne said...

Thank you for sharing, J. You are a very smart young lady!!

Trauma Mama said...

Thank you, J. You are very encouraging to keep moving forward especially on a rough day like today.
My boys are processing a lot.

* said...

It is so good to hear from you,J, since you know exactly what our kids are feeling. You are further along so I don't get to hear the "good stuff" yet. Thank you so much for sharing.

marythemom said...

Thank you for sharing J. It's because of your amazing Mama that my daughter and I are getting through this yuckiness that is RAD. I hope someday my son gains your positive attitude, wish to get better and willingness to work hard. My kids have some additional mental health issues that make this a little harder, but because of your progress I've not given up hope.

Thanks!!

Mary in TX
Mom to sibling group adopted from Nebraska 4+ years ago, Kitty (15) who is recovering from RAD and Bear (17) who is still struggling, and also mom to Bob (14) and Ponito (almost 12).

Donetta said...

What a beautiful heart you have. I am a mom with RAD who has two adopted kids with RAD.
That is NOT WHO we all are it is just what we are all challenged with darlin'

Hannah_Rae said...

J, your "thank you" meant so much to me. Thank you for being so brave. Jeremiah has been working very hard on learning to do tapping and rubbing and shaking, and he wanted to try because he saw YOU do it.

Blessings!

Hannah

Sarah said...

J-
THANK YOU! For sharing your feelings and your life. I read your thoughts earlier today, and cried, and needed time to think before I could thank you. I think I need reminders ALL THE TIME that my son is really scared. He doesn't act scared, he acts MAD. And then I get mad. And I need to remember what you said- that really, he is scared. Hearing it from you helps me. And helping me helps him. So thank you again, and I hope you will work on your blog, because I would love to read more of what you have to say.

SocialWrkr24/7 said...

I am so happy to read your words J! You are such a brave girl - look how much hope you give so many people! Keep being just who you are - You're amazing! :)

Tab said...

Wow, J. You are an awesome kid! What an amazing gift you have. Thank you for being brave enough to help moms and kids that are struggling with the same things. I am proud to know you and your awesome mom.

Mama Drama Times Two said...

Thanks for sharing this and helping me understand how to better help my kids that not only have RAD, but are scared of other things, too! You are very smart and I am glad you wrote this.

Anonymous said...

How amazing is it that other moms can help their kids by sharing with them what you've been able to say here with your mom? I admire your courage a lot, J. Many adults are too afraid to work as hard on themselves and deal with scary things the way you have. Your mom must be very proud of you {}

rachael said...

Thanks for your honesty and openness, J! My Princess is 10 and has been home less than a year (May is our anniversary). She's come a long way and is working hard to be a family girl, but she has big feelings she doesn't know what to do with. I told her about the shaking thing you do. I'll have to show her the video your mom posted!

Tara - SanitySrchr said...

J, you melt my heart! I'm proud that you are working so hard, and I admire your willingness to share with and help other RAD families.

Lindsay Mama to Nine said...

J,
I just found your Moms blog,I just read your brave, smart, touching letter.
I have been blessed with six little kids that have been hurt, six little kids that need to read your letter and know that it takes work, it takes being brave, it takes the hardest thing in the world...letting your Mom and Dad love you. You are so brave. You give me HOPE. I can't wait to read your writeing with my children that have been hurt and feel so lost and scared.
Your Mom is so lucky to have her, and WOW what a Mama you must have!

Lindsay