Me and my big mouth get me in trouble every time. When will I ever learn???? In case y'all have forgotten I mentioned last week that things were going so well. All that bragging.... Kiss of death I tell ya.
The day after my last post (last Thursday) and ever since it has been a radical house. Last week in therapy J looked at her photo album from the abusive FM. It is absolutely heartbreaking to look through. I haven't ever been able to look at it without crying. There's not one single photo where J looks even remotely happy. In every picture her face looks like she has lost her best friend. Even the AT has a hard time looking through it so it's not just me.
So my thoughts are that it sent her flying back into PTSD and all that those feelings that were so hard for her during that time. I'm a short-bus mom sometimes and it takes me a while to figure it out. I can be soooo slow. Dang. Sunday night we sat in the bed and looked at her recent photo album (the one since she's been home) and giggled and talked our way through it. When we got to the end she said, "mom, I look so happy in the whole book. My life is so much better now because I've changed a lot and now I have an awesome mom." That's right honey. She has changed so much. She's not the same little girl that she was 3 years ago.
I was hanging in there on the premise that Sunday night was the cure. Wrong answer. Monday she upped it a notch. Monday night I really didn't want to be around her. Finally called the AT and she encouraged me to do some regression therapy with her today. Hmmmm.....if I waited till she woke up then she might not be nice. When is a kid really, really nice??? When they're asleep. So I waited till she had been asleep about an hour then gave her a bottle of hot chocolate goat milk. She was the sweetest little thing! All the while I was telling her how much I loved her and that she deserved all good things, I would keep her safe, yada yada yada.
This morning she was a different child. She was much more loving, very little radical behavior and had such a better attitude. Woo hoo! Breathing a sigh of relief here.